Pick a facebook status

I`m glad I know sign language, it`s pretty handy.

Whats the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
Ones heavy the others a little lighter.

I miss being a kid. No one cared how you dressed, we were all friends, and you could be yourself. When did we turn so judgmental?

guys: "I need a girl with a fat ass, large boobs, tiny waist, big lips, long hair, etc."
girls: "Tall guys are the best."
guys: "NOT FAIR"

I really hate long-ass ‘previously on…’ bits in front of episodes I fucking know what happened previously ok I just marathonned two seasons

i want to be your favorite person to chill with and talk about deep shit with

my taste in music ranges from "you`ve gotta listen to this!!!" to "i know, don`t judge me"

such a great feeling when someone just genuinely wants to talk to you and wants to know how your life is going

Be good to the people who are there for you, they deserve it.

Dudes be like, "I only talk to one girl."

AND THAT STATUS BE HAVING 15 BITCHES FEELING SPECIAL.