funny facebook statuses

Life is weird, first you wanna grow up, then you wanna be a kid again..

"Want a boyfriend for these cold winter nights" ... Shut up you slut go buy a coat..

I spend all my chilhood, trying to see the fat womans face, on Tom & Jerry ...

went to school with five pen... Came home with zero.. xD

90 people get swine flu and everyone wants to wear a mask . Millions of people have AIDS and HIV yet no one wants to wear a condom !

If it quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, and smells like a duck, it`s probably a Unicorn wearing a duck costume

The amazing moment when the teacher is picking sticks and you call out the person who is next.

Asians are so bad at driving that I`m beginning to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.

there`s always that one employee who stares at you like your going to steal something.
by. caroline

OMG! my rainbow gypsy turtles are arguing with my giant blue monkeys because the orange leprechauns just stole my invisible friends talking muffin!